This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
