just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
