Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
i think my tv is drunk
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Randomize
