HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
Randomize
