Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
