I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
