sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Every concussion has its silver lining
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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