hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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