I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize