I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
