we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Randomize