they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Randomize