We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
