Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
How does one acquire holy water?
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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