careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Buhtt sex?
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize