I got chris browned last night
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
