I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
