I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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