I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
