Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
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