Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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