Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I miss vodka workout Fridays
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
