I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Randomize
