Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
jump out the window naked night went bad
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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