Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
