Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
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