We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize