I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Randomize