wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize