I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
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