I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
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