butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Blow job season was short but glorious.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
