It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize