You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize