Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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