So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
it glows. i had to have it.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
