everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize
