Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize
