Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
