i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
