Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
You made out with two different species that night
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Randomize
