His hands were made for my vagina.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
