Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
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