I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
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