Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
