dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
