No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
