I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Go christen that room with your naked body.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
