I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize