You can't motorboat a personality
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
