I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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