doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
